In general, this is a very disempowering way to live life – you are essentially shackling your happiness to the actions of a guy (and at the moment, it doesn’t even seem like he’s doing a good job delivering on what you want him to do.) Something to consider is if it’s just a matter of your guy’s texting habits – take our “What’s His ‘Texting Style’ Mean?
” Quiz and see what his texting habits mean about your relationship.
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I don’t understand…we will be texting back and forth for a few, then nothing…air silence! I would say that we guys prefer text because it makes it easier to avoid talking to someone when we don’t feel like it.
Speaking for myself, there have been times when I’ve bailed on responding to a text simply because I’m busy with something else.
So when I talk about neediness or acting needy, I’m not recommending that you change how you behave or even try to avoid these actions. A much more empowering mindset is to simply not settle for what you don’t want and seek out what you do want… Also, I want to be clear that good, clear communication of what you want and what you don’t want is part of any good and healthy relationship.
Rather, I’m recommending that you change how you think about things and, therefore, the needy behaviors and ways of acting naturally disappear. It’s believing that you “need” the other person to act a certain way, be a certain way, do specific things or say specific things… There’s nothing wrong with having preference for what you want and only settling for what you want. The problem with the needy mindset is that when you’re not getting what you want, you have a strong negative reaction because you think of his specific behavior as something you “need” in order to be OK… So bear in mind that this response to you is from the context that you’ve repeatedly brought this up as an issue and there’s been no change in his behavior.
I think all guys would generally agree: we tend to be single-minded in what we’re doing and focus on meeting one objective at a time. 5) If I’m with another girl (note: If I’m in a relationship it’s monogamous, I never cheat, but if not dating around is fair game.) If you want to know why specifically he’s not texting you back (and what to do about it), click here to take our “Why Doesn’t He Text Back? In your situation, it sounds like this guy will try to make plans and then when it gets complicated, or it seems like it isn’t going to happen, he directs his attention elsewhere and doesn’t feel the need to text further (again it comes down to the concept of a man’s tendency to single-mindedly fixate on fulfilling an objective or reaching a goal).
Anything outside of our focus at that moment is a distraction that we don’t want to “deal with”. Now you mentioned that you’ve expressed your frustration over his behavior and he hasn’t changed. ’) you might think you’re drawing a line in the sand, but he sees it as something else entirely: NEEDINESS.
Nobody is forcing you to be in a relationship with this guy and if he’s not putting in the effort to communicate with you, you’re going to be far better off filling your time with other ways to be happy (versus what many women do…
which is to stress over the guy more and more, which makes the guy even more of a fixation point, invests her in him more emotionally, etc.) I would highly encourage you to read the comments and discussions from different women who have experienced their guy not texting back.
You’re definitely not alone – as you can see, tons of women have experienced the “guy doesn’t text back” phenomenon.
Not only will you see a pattern, but you’ll also see tons of comments where Sabrina and I personally responded.
This is an example of not accepting behavior that you don’t want conflict.